Friday, January 15, 2010

a letter to my heart.

a letter to my heart,
i'm sorry. i'm sorry for all the torment ive put you through and all that youve dealt with from me. i'm sorry for how much you ache, and all the cracks that scar your skin. i'm sorry for all the hurtful memories and all the tears. i'm sorry for letting you be used, mistreated and abused. i am so sorry. i am so sorry for letting you be taken advantage of, for letting you be ripped and torn apart. i am sorry for letting you be so carelessly taken care of, walked all over, and bruised so badly. i am sorry for all the walls youve had to surround yourself in, and im sorry for how weak youve become. i'm sorry for all that you have had to be put through, i am sorry for how deeply youve been crushed. i am so sorry for how slowly you seem to be breaking. i know it seems like it'll never get better, but it will. you see that don't you? its already getting better, we just needed some help for us to see that light at the end of a darkened tunnel. we needed someone on our side, to pick us up and tell us to let go of the past. i know, you feel like that person is going to hurt you too, don't you? youre scared. i understand that you are and i know, that someone has already hurt you before, but it's made you better hasn't it? and everyone hurts another every now and then, dont they? but you know that this someone, well, theyve been such a big help and so fast. i can see that you realize this by the way you speed up whenever he is in the room. i see it by the way you slow down when he's near, when his lips are so close. i know by the way you seem to whisper his name with every beat. right now he's whats keeping your hopes up, right? well, i'll try my best to take care of you, and patch you up, hopefully he will too. i'm sorry though, for everything. unfortunately we don't know what is in store for us, what will happen in the future and i can't control it, nor can i change the past. we just have to keep fighting, and hopefully get stronger. just, hold on.
lovingly, me.

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